(This is taken an adapted from a piece I wrote for the Crosswalk Devotional podcast, which published on April 23, 2025. Find the full, audio version HERE.)
When someone’s approval feels life-giving, their rejection can feel soul-crushing.
Years ago, I met a woman who seemed highly enamored of almost everything I did. She loved my novels, wanted to serve with me in ministry, and appeared supportive of my calling. Soon, we developed a friendship that quickly turned toxic.
When I made leadership decisions she disagreed with, she tried pulling others onto her side through triangulation. When that didn’t work, she turned to slander and gossip. Initially, this confused me. How could someone go from a self-proclaimed fan and supporter to so hurtful so quickly?
As I prayerfully processed through the situation, I began to see things more clearly. She never truly valued me. Rather, she loved the version of me she’d created in her mind. When I failed to live up to the person and friend she imagined, her admiration quickly turned ugly.
Unfortunately, experiences like this aren’t uncommon. Human praise often proves unstable. The same person who applauds us one moment may criticize or reject us the next. And when we base our worth on other people’s approval, their shifting opinions can create confusing wounds.
When I land in that place, I gain comfort from knowing that Jesus understands, because He experienced it. One of the most thought-provoking examples comes from John 2.
This scene occurred near the beginning of Jesus’ earthly ministry. After clearing the Temple courts of merchants and money changers, He immediately faced opposition from religious leaders questioning His authority. Yet at the same time, crowds gathered around Him, amazed by the miracles He performed. Some admired Him while others challenged Him. Some believed Him while others rejected Him.
Regarding this, Scripture provides this insight: “But Jesus would not entrust himself to them, for he knew all people” (John 2:24, NIV).
Notice what this verse doesn’t say. Jesus didn’t withhold love or avoid relationship. In fact, He formed deep bonds with the disciples despite knowing they would abandon Him in His darkest hour. Christ loved people deeply and compassionately, without basing His identity or worth on their ever-changing opinions.
Instead, He entrusted Himself fully to the Father, the One who knew Him fully and loved Him completely.
Because human praise is fickle. The crowds shouting “Hosanna!” would soon cry, “Crucify Him!” The disciples who promised unwavering loyalty would scatter in fear. Yet Jesus remained grounded in who He was and what He came to do, because His identity rested securely in the Father’s unchanging love.
This allowed Him to love others with radical grace and compassion.
Jesus saw human weakness clearly. He understood pride, fear, self-protection and brokenness better than we ever will. Yet His knowledge of humanity didn’t harden Him or cause Him to withdraw emotionally. Instead, it moved Him to mercy.
While hanging on the cross, rejected and mocked, He prayed, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34, NIV).
Christ longs for us to experience that same freedom. He invites us to become so rooted in His love and secure in our identity as His beloved children that we stop allowing others to define our worth.
For many of us, that healing develops slowly, especially when rejection wounds run deep. But as we walk with Christ day by day, hurt by hurt, He heals those fragile places within us. He teaches us how to love others deeply without entrusting our souls to their approval.
Most importantly, in Him, we find the acceptance our hearts most need.
If this post resonated with you, I encourage you to listen to the Faith Over Fear podcast episode titled “Feeling Left Out? Christ Seats You at the Table of Honor.“
I also invite you to read through my Bible reading plan titled “Embracing Your True Self: Living in Your Christ-Centered Identity” found on the YouVersion Bible reading app.
