How God heals regret and restores joy

by Jennifer Slattery on June 12, 2025June 14, 2025

(Note: This was taken and adapted from one of my Crosswalk Premium Devotional Videos. Used by permission.)

Do you ever find yourself rehashing past mistakes? Maybe your adult son or daughter has become enslaved to self-destructing behavior, and your mind keeps replaying all your parenting regrets. Or, maybe you’re trying to repair a marriage damaged from years of neglect and your heart aches for the relational intimacy lost.

As someone who’s been on a healing and growth journey for a long, hot minute–out of necessity!–I understand the sting of regret.

When I focus on my mistakes, or all I’ve lost due to the mistakes of others, however, I quickly land in a place of despair. When I instead focus on, and make much of, the love, heart, power, and grace of God, working in and through me, I’m filled with hope and the reminder that He excels at rebuilding the rubble in our lives—as He did with the ancient Israelites some twenty-five hundred years ago.

After seventy years of living in exile, due to their idolatry and wickedness, they had returned to their homeland in Jerusalem, which their enemies had reduced to rubble.

And so, by the miraculous hand of God, they began the task of rebuilding what, in essence, evil nearly destroyed.

Eventually, under leaders named Ezra and Zerubbabel, they rebuilt the Temple. This brings us to the time period recorded in the book Nehemiah, which chronicles when Nehemiah returned to Jerusalem to help the ancient Israelites rebuild the city’s walls.

They complete this massive undertaking in chapter 6 and the people and leaders are redistributed throughout the land—to avoid overcrowding in Jerusalem.

Once everyone was settled, Ezra, Nehemiah and the Levites gathered the people for a celebration and public reading of Scripture.

Hearing God’s word, the people became grieved by all the ways they’d dishonored the Lord, and as today’s passage states, began to weep. To which Nehemiah and the other religious leaders replied:

“This day is holy to the LORD your God. Do not mourn or weep.” For all the people had been weeping as they listened to the words of the Law. Nehemiah said, “Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.”

In other words, “Now is a time for celebration, not weeping, to praise the Lord for all He’s done to restore His people and their land.”

They encouraged the people to receive and celebrate God’s lavish and abundant grace.

May we learn to do the same. We can’t go back and undo or change the past, but we can rest in the redemption given us in Christ and move forward empowered by His Spirit at work in us.

We can learn to receive, and live deeply anchored in His grace, knowing that His mercies are new every morning, and He is, at every moment, rebuilding, repairing, and restoring what sin and our world’s evil threatened to destroy. In my experience, this is a lifelong process of bringing our hurts, insecurities and regrets to Christ, sitting in His presence and allowing His love to wash over us, and consistently choosing to His truths, such as that we’re His beloved children, to wash over us.

How to Trust God When Prayers Go Unanswered – Faith Over Fear

In this powerful episode of Faith Over Fear, Carol sits down with Chad Roberts to confront one of the most painful lies we believe in suffering: If God loved me, He would stop this. Even more deeply, many of us quietly wrestle with the fear that suffering means God has abandoned us. Through Chad’s personal story of losing his sight, this conversation gently but firmly reframes that lie with truth: God’s presence is not measured by our comfort. Instead of standing at a distance, He steps into our pain—and never leaves. Together, Carol and Chad explore how suffering can distort our view of God and whisper dangerous lies about His character. Rooted in Scripture, they walk through the stories of Joseph, Job, and ultimately Jesus, reminding us that while God may not always provide explanations, He always offers His presence. The cross becomes the clearest picture of this truth—not a removal of suffering, but redemption through it. This episode also unpacks what it means to develop unshakable confidence in God—not confidence in outcomes, but in His character. Chad offers practical insight into what “suffering well” looks like in everyday moments and how to guard your heart against bitterness when life doesn’t go as planned. For those walking alongside someone in pain, this conversation provides compassionate guidance on what to say—and what not to say—encouraging listeners to replace empty platitudes with meaningful presence. If you’re in a season of pain, disappointment, or questioning where God is, this episode offers a steady reminder: you are not alone, and your suffering is not a sign of God’s absence—but an invitation to experience His nearness in a deeper way. Resource referenced: Blind Faith: Seeing God Through Darkness by Chad Roberts Biblical verses and passages discussed: Psalm 118:24 James 1:2 Mark 11:22 Psalm 23:2 Jeremiah 2:13 2 Corinthians 4:17 1 Peter 4:19 Isaiah 40:31 Connect with Chad Roberts: On his website On Instagram On Facebook Follow his work on Amazon Find Carol McCracken: On her website On Facebook On Instagram Reflective Questions: When you’re in a difficult season, what thoughts do you tend to believe about God—and are they rooted in truth or in fear? Have you ever equated God’s love with your level of comfort? How might that belief be shaping your faith right now? What would it look like for you to shift from trusting outcomes to trusting God’s character? In what ways might God be inviting you to experience His presence in your current struggle rather than removing it? How do you typically respond to others who are suffering—and how can you grow in offering presence instead of quick answers? What is one simple, grounding practice you can begin this week to stay anchored in truth when suffering feels overwhelming? Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Overcoming Shame Through Grace: Guest post by Shadia Hrichi

by Jennifer Slattery on June 5, 2025June 4, 2025

As a child, had you ever done something wrong and were unable to look your parents in the eye?

A few years ago, I was visiting my brother and his family.

We were all enjoying the afternoon sunshine on his back deck as the children played in the backyard. At one point, I overheard my brother tell my 5-year-old niece not to swing from the branches of a very small tree.

Minutes later, crash!

We all heard a loud crack as she and the branch came tumbling down.

I watched as my niece timidly walked to her dad, hanging her head as she pointed to the broken branch.

My brother bent down, spoke something to her, and then they hugged. In no time, she was again laughing and playing. I was just given an opportunity to witness a father’s love and forgiveness as in the Bible.

”As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him…” Psalm 103:13

Overcoming Shame Through Faith In Jesus Christ

Understanding God’s Compassion For Sinners. As God’s child, I can easily picture hanging my head low when I know I’ve broken one of God’s commands. But that day, I saw the situation from a different angle.

My niece disobeyed, was powerless to remedy her situation, and was too ashamed to look her father in the eye. But my brother reached down to meet her where she was. Stretching out his hand, he lifted her eyes to meet his so she could see his desire to forgive and restore their relationship.

Dealing With Shame And Forgiveness In Christianity

It is the same for each one of us. Covered in sin and shame, you and I are powerless to reach a holy God. Our heavenly Father must reach down to us. So God sent His Son Jesus Christ, who stretched out his hands on the cross, beckoning us to lift our eyes and remember that God passionately desires to forgive and restore us.

“…at just the right time, when we were still powerless… God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us…” Romans 5:6,8

Heavenly Father, when we sin, lift our eyes to the cross so that we can remember Your forgiveness and embrace the power to live as Your beloved children. Amen.

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. ” 1 John 1:9

Get to Know Shadia Hrichi:

Shadia Hrichi is a passionate Bible teacher, award-winning author, and speaker who stirs the hearts and minds of her audience through personal story, illustration, and her unwavering confidence in the authority of God’s Word.

She holds a master’s in biblical and theological studies as well as a master’s in criminal justice. Shadia is the author of several Bible studies, including RAHAB, TAMAR, HAGAR, LEGION, and WORTHY OF LOVE and the recipient of the 2022 WCCW “God’s Word is Alive” Award. Residing in northern California, Shadia is often invited to speak at churches, conferences, women’s retreats and other events, and loves to visit the ocean each week for “a date with Jesus.”

Check Out Shadia Hrichi’s Bible Study, Hagar:

Join gifted Bible teacher Shadia Hrichi and journey into the story of Hagar. Through this in-depth Bible study, you will find that when you surrender your life into God’s hands, your trials and triumphs serve a magnificent purpose: to draw you into the arms of your heavenly Father, the faithful God Who Sees Me.

How to Trust God When Prayers Go Unanswered – Faith Over Fear

God’s Perfect Love for Imperfect People

by Jennifer Slattery on May 1, 2025April 30, 2025

(This first published on Crosswalk.com and in the Crosswalk Devotional, adapted below.)

Many of us have heard people talk about the Lord’s complete forgiveness and unconditional love but can expect Him to withhold both when we mess up. Most often, this stems from times in which others responded to our mistakes with some degree of emotional distance. I can relate. For decades, I struggled to fully receive God’s grace, and sometimes still do. Perhaps that’s one of the reasons I find the words recorded in Psalm 103:8 so beautiful.

It reads:

The Lord is compassionate and gracious,
slow to anger, abounding in love (NIV).

Written by David, ancient Israel’s second king, this verse reiterates the way God revealed Himself to a man named Moses around four hundred years prior.

This occurred shortly after the Lord’s newly liberated people rebelled against Him to worship idols. Following, God told Moses that He wouldn’t accompany him and the Hebrews into the new land He’d promised them. But then He appeared to relent and in Exodus 33:15 stated, “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”

Perhaps confused, or simply wanting to experience more of the God with whom he’d already come to converse with as a friend (Ex. 33:11), Moses said, “Now show me your glory.” One could phrase this as, “Reveal the essence of who You are.” God did, declaring Himself compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in lovingkindness.

David likely knew how the Lord described Himself to Moses and how consistently He lived out those traits with the often faithless and rebellious Hebrew people. In today’s verse, He praised God for those same qualities. While Scripture doesn’t reveal David’s circumstances when he wrote Psalm 103, we do know from other passages that He landed in numerous situations that plunged him into despair and overwhelming fear. We also know that God faithfully cared for, protected, and defended David throughout His life. And, the Lord showed David grace when he failed as a father, a king, and chief commander over the Israelite army.

In other words, David hadn’t simply learned of the Lord’s love, mercy and compassion from Scripture. He’d experienced those same traits when he’d desperately needed them. Likely reflecting on who God was and all He’d done, David began his prose with a praise that arose from his inmost being, the deepest and truest part of him. He then recounted numerous blessings God provided—forgiveness for even the worst of sins, emotional and physical healing, restoration of seemingly hopeless lives, provision, vitality, justice for the oppressed, and guidance for those who find themselves wandering about in desert places.

In verse 4, we read that the God who “redeems [our] life from the pit” also “crowns [us] with love and compassion.” One might phrase this as, “He rescues us in our weakest and most helpless state and enveloped us in grace.” When the devil tries to bury me in toxic shame, I’m reminded that God’s favor toward us stems from His goodness alone, and not from anything we have or haven’t done.

Because while He is the Almighty Creator of all that exists and the One who holds all authority in His powerful hands, that wasn’t how He most defined Himself to Moses, and therefore, to us. When we reflect upon who He is at His core, He doesn’t want us to think of His anger. Instead, He wants us to recognize, intellectually and from personal experience, that He is first and foremost a God of unfathomable love and grace.

Expanding on this, David then drew an analogy between the Lord and caring parents (Psalm 103:13). Our heavenly Father views us with more tenderness than an attentive mother with an over-tired two-year-old and a patient dad with an emotionally dysregulated middle schooler. Because, as verse 14 states, “he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust” (NIV). In other words, He remains cognizant of our humanity.

The Lord recognizes how much we long to please Him and how grieved we feel when we mess up. He sees our ongoing struggle against sin and the wounded places in our souls that cause us to react in fear and self-protection. And while He’s given us everything, in Christ and Scripture, to stand firm, whatever we face, He also understands how easily we become deceived.

He has compassion for who we truly are, in all our weaknesses and sins, and responds to our greatest failures with mercy and forgiveness, rather than anger and condemnation. Living in that reality helps us rise again when we fall, with our gaze fixed not on our past nor our shame but on the Savior who proved every word of today’s verse true when He died on the cross to quite literally redeem our lives from the pit of hell (verse 4).

How to Trust God When Prayers Go Unanswered – Faith Over Fear

Unlearning Psuedo-spirituality to more deeply rest in grace

by Jennifer Slattery on March 6, 2025March 5, 2025

I’m in a season of unlearning pseudo-spiritual maturity and resting afresh in Christ’s grace. If asked a few years ago, I would’ve said I had a close relationship with God and learned to trust in and receive His love. That’s not to say I haven’t experienced transformation in my three-plus decades of actively following Him. But I spent too much time operating from self-reliance rather than the grace He lavished upon me. As a result, shame often overshadowed the freedom Christ promised.

The other day, I happened upon decade-plus old prayer journals. Day after day, my entries read much the same. I wrote how I needed to be more patient and gracious with others, less irritable and prone to “offense”, and more apt to pray before reacting in frustration or overwhelm.

Don’t misunderstand. Those are lofty goals that, embodied, beautifully reflect our Savior’s heart. The problem stemmed from my largely self-reliant approach. I knew, intellectually, that I couldn’t will myself into better behavior, or correct my faults by memorizing and reciting verses.

Yes, my soul needs truth. Absorbing Scripture into the marrow of my bones, as my Faith Over Fear cohost Carol McCracken once phrased it, plays a vital part in my spiritual vitality. But its most significant role is helping me experience the One who preserved every word recorded in my Bible and to teach me, through that connection, how to truly love and live loved.

If you’ve spent much time in church, you’ve likely heard sermons on John 15, where Jesus encourages us to live as closely connected to Him as a ripening grape remains with the vine. The moment someone plucks the fruit, it begins to die; no amount of effort, regardless how sincere, can prevent that.

But what does remaining connected to Christ look like in our typical, often busy and stressful day? And when the chaos of our world pulls us from our figurative prayer closets, have we failed?

That brings me back to those old journals filled with regret, “shoulds” and “musts.” If only I resided more fully in God’s presence and yielded more completely to His Spirit within me, I wouldn’t become emotionally triggered or allow selfishness, pride or fear to drive my actions.

Not necessarily.

We can’t will ourselves to increased healing, love, or faith. As Dr. Markus Warner stated in his book Breakthrough, “… for most of us, willpower and decision making are pretty fickle allies. … While both truth and wise decisions are good ideas, there is something deeper than both of them: our bond, union, or attachment with God. The true hub of our faith is our union with Christ, which makes us one with God.”

For some, this may feel like a soul-crushing statement. How can we develop that level of attachment when past wounds challenge our trust and perceptions? More difficult, how can we break free from lies that cause us, subconsciously, to approach God from a “pass-fail” mentality where we feel close to Him when we’re doing the right things and distant when we’ve messed up?

In those moments, has He truly withdrawn from us, or are we interpreting our expectations as reality? How can we possibly see His heart accurately, and receive His grace, in that mentally skewed place?

By turning to Him, as best we can, as often as we can, trusting Him to lead, heal and transform. By relinquishing false notions of instant, or even quick, healing and transformation. And lastly, by resisting our often deeply ingrained beliefs that we earn His love and grace through right behavior and instead allowing Him to teach us what true, holy relationship looks like.

If shame, rather than a desire for deeper connection, tends to drive your spiritual disciplines and your inner narrative gets stuck on what you should and shouldn’t do, rather than reflecting on how deeply you’re loved, you might find the following resources helpful:

Breakthrough!: 5 Essential Strategies for Freedom, Healing, and Wholeness by Dr. Marcus Warner

The Emmanuel Promise: Discovering the Security of a Life Held by God by Summer Joy Gross.

How to Trust God When Prayers Go Unanswered – Faith Over Fear

When we approach others from a place of assumption

by Jennifer Slattery on October 17, 2024October 17, 2024

I’ve been hurt by people who’ve formed assumptions regarding my pain. I’ve also wounded others by reacting the same way. Sometimes, this comes from a desire to “fix” a loved one’s problem. Other times, I’ve interpreted their words and behavior through my insecurities and the unhealed places in my soul. Regardless the reason, these tendencies inevitably create distance, rather than connection, and often, increased hurt for everyone involved.

I reflected upon some of my most glaring regrets recently while reading about all Kristina Kuzmic and her family endured when her teenage son developed significant depression. I was awed and convicted by the way she remained gently present, sought help to learn how best to love him, and intentionally maintained an attitude of curiosity rather than assumption.

While she deeply grieved her son’s pain, she didn’t assign motive to his behavior (such as, he’s just lazy or rebellious). She also didn’t make it about herself.

Although I’m much better than I used to be, I struggle in both these areas. I tend to view “biting” behavior (like that which a frightened puppy exhibits) or withdrawal as rejection. This, in turn, results in my defensiveness and self-protection rather than gentleness and love.

I’m reminded of Jesus’ words in Matthew 7:3-5, when He said, ³“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? ⁴How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? ⁵You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

This passage tells me that, in all situations and at all times, my sight is distorted. Sin, past wounding, and spiritual deception taint my perspective, which, inevitably, causes me to inflict pain. (Imagine an ophthalmologist attempting cataract surgery with blurred vision!) When, however, I invite God to reveal, then heal and remove, the plank lodged in my figurative eye (symbolic of my soul), I see more clearly how to help my brother, or husband, or child, or friend, with their speck.

When I do that, I find, more often than not, that God’s responsible for removing my loved one’s speck, and He knows precisely the best way to do so. My role is to simply remain present, and to listen with curiosity, not assumption.

https://videopress.com/v/Q8oIrP8P?resizeToParent=true&cover=true&preloadContent=metadata&useAverageColor=true

If you someone you love is suffering, I encourage you to catch that episode for important insights regarding how best to help, not harm. And may we all, daily, invite God to remove our planks so that we don’t hurt others in our blinded state. May He give us the clear vision that enables us to love with equal parts grace and truth, with hearts purified, filled, and led by our Lord.

If this post resonated with you, I encourage you to listen to the latest Faith Over Fear podcast episode in which I interview comedian Kristina Kuzmic about one of the most painful seasons of her life. Find it below.

How to Trust God When Prayers Go Unanswered – Faith Over Fear

Finding Our True Selves––the Unveiling of Faith

by Jennifer Slattery on June 27, 2024June 27, 2024

(This first published in 2020.)

We can’t live like a queen while prancing through the pig sty, and make no mistake, you and I are royalty of incredible value. Learning to live in this truth, changes everything—our behavior, perceptions and interactions. This reality increases our freedom, just as surely as not grasping this truth leads to slavery.

Years ago, our family opened our home to a young woman who hadn’t a clue who she was.

She believed she held no worth outside of her looks and whatever attention she gained from boys. She received what she sought, at least, on the surface. Her phone constantly lit up with messages from young men who spoke charming words in the moment, only to use her. Although her friends bathed her in compliments, her emptiness remained.

I’m convinced Christianity is less about becoming and more about unveiling who we truly are; who we were created to be. It’s like, prior to Jesus, we’ve all suffered from a case of mistaken identity. We’ve allowed all the voices of the world to confuse and define us, leaving us insecure and bruised. But as we draw closer to Christ, He whispers to our hearts, “That, my child, is not who you are, who I created you to be. You’re mine. You’re loved, fully and eternally. A creature of inexpressible value, hand-crafted in My image, to shine as a beautiful reflection of me.”

In Genesis 1:26, God said, “Let us make mankind in Our image, in Our likeness …” In the original Hebrew, “Let us make mankind as Our shadow …”

When my daughter was young, she loved making her shadow dance and jump. When she skipped, her shadow did as well. It twirled as fast or as slow as she did, remaining, forever connected to her, the form it represented. The greater the light, the stronger and more defined her shadow. Similarly, as the light dimmed, her shadow faded.

In other words, we discover our truest selves not by chasing after success, accolades, or approval. To the contrary. That will only blur our edges and distort our true beauty. We find ourselves in the One who loves us, knows us, and called us to forever shadow Him.

The apostle Paul, who wrote much of the New Testament, understood this. When speaking to the ancient Ephesians he recognized their behaviors and weaknesses, absolutely. But he saw their Christ-centered identity first. God their Father had called them out of the pig sty and to Himself. And lest they felt tempted to prance back to the muck they’d once danced in, Paul reminded them, emphatically, “That is not who you are!”

He told them they were God’s holy people (v. 1). They were far from lacking, for they were abundantly blessed. They weren’t rejected or cast aside. To the contrary, they were chosen by the supreme Creator Himself. They were to shake off the memories of every slimy pit they’d once fallen into, for God had declared them holy and blameless, redeemed and forgiven.

That was their true identity. Their challenge, then, was to learn to live in that reality. They needed to learn to live in grace as children of grace.

We do as well, because identity changes everything, and Christ paid much too high a price for you and I to ever go tiptoeing through the pig sties again.

So how do we do this? By allowing God to change the way we think until our thoughts mirror His, because His thoughts always lead us toward His love and truth. He always leads us toward the absolutely best versions of ourselves. May we never accept the cheap substitutes our world tries to force upon us ever again.

If you’re struggling to live anchored in your true identity, you might find my conversation with Grace Fox in my sixth podcast episode, Moving Past the Fear of Insignificance helpful. You can find it HERE.

Connect with me on Facebook and Instagram.

Additional resources:

Nothing to Prove by Jennie Allen

Reclaiming Our Identity, video presentation, session one in the Becoming His Princess Bible study.

Anchored and Secure: Sixty Days of Resting in Grace

Thanks to Christ’s death and resurrection, we don’t have to stress, strive, or perform. We simply need to rest in what Christ has already done. That is when we begin to come alive and find the power and courage to live as He intended. That’s when we experience true and lasting freedom. This sixty-day devotional helps women reflect on God’s grace and the freedom of living deeply anchored in Him.

Before you go, fun news! Faith Over Fear is now on GodTube. Find us HERE! (We’re working to upload past episodes now.)

Catch the latest episode (in audio) HERE.

For Those Who Fear they’ve disappointed God – Guest post by Debbie Wilson

by Jennifer Slattery on June 6, 2024June 5, 2024

I’ve become increasingly aware of how often we tend to interpret Scripture based on ideas, perhaps those we don’t consciously realize, developed from a lifetime spent in our often punitive culture. Our greatest healing and transformation come as we discover who He truly is and live in alignment with that.

For those who often feel like a disappointment, may you gain comfort and encouragement from Debbie Wilson’s post below.

For Those Who Fear They’ve Disappointed God

by Debbie Wilson

Do you think God is disappointed in you? He’s not.

You cannot shock or disappoint God. How do I know this? Because the Bible says that we were chosen “according to the foreknowledge of God the Father” (1 Peter 1:2 NIV). In other words, God knew everything about you and me before we were born, before He chose us.

He knew everything He was getting in me, yet still chose me to be His child and to represent His Kingdom. That is not a pass to misbehave. It is an incentive to get up when I fall—to press on. God knows He did not make a mistake in choosing you or me. He will fulfill His purpose in us. He knows the Spirit won’t fail to form Christlikeness in us (1 John 3:2-3).

We disappoint when we fail to meet someone’s expectations. Since God knew everything about me before I was born, my falls don’t surprise Him. Because I’m still learning the depth of sin’s influence, I’m shocked and disappointed with myself when sin rears its ugly head. But God isn’t.

I imagine Him thinking, Dear child, you think that is bad, you haven’t seen the half of it. There is more where that came from. But My Son’s blood covered that too!

I may not disappoint God, but I can sadden Him. When I cave in to sinful impulses and disobey His wise standards, I hurt Him, myself, and others. Knowing this would happen, God provided the blood of Jesus to continually wash us, so we can continue the process of being transformed into the image of Christ (1 John 1:5-10).

Wallowing in self-condemnation and guilt paralyzes and sidelines us from our higher calling. Holding on to shame is destructive and makes us self-conscious instead of Christ-conscious. Just as God knew Adam and Eve would fall, David would miserably fail, and Peter would deny Him, He knew you and I would mess up. Yet, He still chose them—and us—to be part of His forever family and build His kingdom on earth.

What have you done to disappoint yourself? Admit it to God and experience His forgiveness. He already knows; He’s not shocked. He stands ready to restore you and get you back on track. He loves you with the love of a perfect Father.

” … who have been chosen according to the foreknowledge of God the Father, through the sanctifying work of the Spirit, to be obedient to Jesus Christ and sprinkled with his blood: Grace and peace be yours in abundance” (1 Peter 1:2).

Adapted from Give Yourself a Break by Debbie Wilson.

More About Debbie’s Book, Give Yourself a Break:

Give Yourself a Break is an interactive study that will help you experience Jesus in ten areas that commonly cause stress. Learn how stop worry and guilt, reframe how you view unreasonable people and your work, and win the battle in your mind and with temptations. Experience the sweet peace that comes only from trusting Jesus. https://debbiewwilson.com/give-yourself-a-break/

Get to Know Debbie Wilson:

Debbie W. Wilson is an award-winning author, Bible teacher, and former Christian counselor who speaks and writes to connect fellow sojourners to the heart of Christ. She and her husband lead Lighthouse Ministries, a non-profit Christian counseling and Bible teaching ministry. Despite time in Boston, the Midwest, and Southern California, Debbie still says y’all. Her family, which includes two grown children and two mischievous standard poodles, calls North Carolina home. Connect with Debbie, find free resources, and learn about her books at debbieWwilson.com.

How to Trust God When Prayers Go Unanswered – Faith Over Fear

How God Speaks: When We Seek His Heart

by Jennifer Slattery on May 16, 2024May 15, 2024

(This is a repost from April 30, 2020)

We all want to hear from God. At least, many of us do. We want that special revelation, to receive that call, or perhaps the answer to that problem or decision we’ve been wrestling over. I’ve been in that place so many times, and I’m certain I’ll land there again. But while God indeed wants us to continually seek His guidance, His desire for us go so much deeper.

He wants our hearts. He wants us. All of us. And He wants us to want Him—more than His answers or solutions. When I’m in that place of wrestling, I have to ask myself, what do I want more? That “special word” from God or God to connect with God Himself?

And here’s what’s beautiful. When I seek God’s presence above all else, His guidance follows. In fact, His guidance becomes a part of me as He gently yet consistently molds my heart and will and transforms my thinking.

I hear Him most clearly when I lose myself in Him and make Him and Him alone my prize. What a tender, loving, and faithful Father He is! He draws me to Himself, invites me to worship, and then, in this context of love—love from Him to me and me to Him—He speaks. And in that moment of divine intimacy, all confusion, angst, and anxiety flee as confidence and courage well within.

He inspires me to do His will and empowers me for whatever’s ahead. This has always been His way.

The apostle Paul, perhaps the most effective and empowered missionary of all time, is a great example of this. You can read about his history and journeys in the book of Acts, but to paraphrase, while he was vehemently seeking to persecute God’s children, Christ intervened, transformed him, and ignited within him a new, life-giving passion to share the gospel.

That’s God’s call for all of us—to proclaim the power and reality of grace. But we each also have a more unique, more defined call as well, perhaps to mentor youth or write encouraging letters to shut-ins or teach Bible studies to young moms.

Some of you may have discovered how God wants to use you in this season, but perhaps you’re not quite certain. Maybe you’re in a period of waiting and God seems silent, and so you’re asking, maybe even begging, for Him to reveal your next steps. I get it. Those “blurry” periods can be difficult and painful, and in the waiting, we might be tempted to seek God’s call more than we seek Him—forgetting that He alone is the source of all that is good and hope-filled, fulfilling, and true. Forgetting that He is faithful to give us all we need, answers included, when we need it.

There’s a sense of rest, and power, displayed by those who get that, who’ve learned to consistently quiet themselves in God’s presence, and to seek His presence above all. Paul exemplified this. “For me to live is Christ,” he wrote, “and to die is gain” (Phil. 1:21, NIV). It was from that sense of devotion, of connection, that he received his unique, history-changing call to share Christ with the Gentiles. Acts 13:2 tells us while the prophets and teachers at Antioch “were worshiping the Lord and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, ‘Dedicate Barnabas and Saul for the special work to which I have called them” (NLT).

In the middle of worship, God spoke.

That’s often how He interacts with us as well, because while, yes, He longs to guide us, He longs for us more.

There’s a sense of rest, and power, displayed by those who get that, who’ve learned to consistently quiet themselves in God’s presence, and to seek His presence above all. Paul exemplified this. “For me to live is Christ,” he wrote, “and to die is gain” (Phil. 1:21, NIV). It was from that sense of devotion, of connection, that he received his unique, history-changing call to share Christ with the Gentiles. Acts 13:2 tells us while the prophets and teachers at Antioch “were worshiping the Lord and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, ‘Set apart for me Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them.’” (NIV).

In the middle of worship, God spoke.

That’s often how He interacts with us as well, because while, yes, He longs to guide us, He longs for us more.

Let’s talk about this! How do you connect with God? When do you tend to feel closest to Him? What are some ways you intentionally cultivate a relationship with Christ?

Share your thoughts in the comments below.

How to Trust God When Prayers Go Unanswered – Faith Over Fear

Finding Joy in the Chaos

by Jennifer Slattery on April 20, 2023April 19, 2023

(Note: This first posted in April of 2017.)

Does failing at something you’ve been assigned or entrusted with cause your stomach to knot? When you miss a deadline, does your thought life run amuck? The bigger question is, are you living in grace? That’s not to say we shouldn’t hold ourselves accountable and honestly assess our shortcomings and errors, but when we do, may we do so with an eye on grace.

As my guest today explains, that’s when we find peace and joy, even in the chaos.

Joy in the Chaos by Ralene Burke

As a writer and editor, there’s nothing like missing a deadline to take the wind out of my sails. That feeling of failure that wraps around my heart, squeezes, and then pops any modicum of self-esteem. Darkness falls over my day, and joy leaks away with each deprecating thought.

It didn’t start out that way, though. I was excited to receive the opportunity. I wrote it on my calendar, even setting the deadline a little earlier than the one that had been given to me. But as with many best laid plans, chaos intervened.

My husband and I got locked into a home improvement job that took more time and money than we had originally intended. Two of my social media clients had some “urgent” stuff that had to go up on social media or in newsletters right away. My allergies went into overdrive and had me laid out for a week.

My self-imposed deadline came and went. So did the one I’d been officially given.

It’s funny how the enemy knows those exact moments when we feel like a failure. When we could choose to accept the mistake and learn, joy and peace follows, but instead he presses those thoughts of what a mess we are, how there is no hope for us. He tells us God is so disappointed, along with everyone else.

Deep breath.

Ultimately, life isn’t about the missed deadlines. It isn’t about the crazy schedules or long to-do lists. Life is about opportunities. The opportunity to follow God, to be obedient, and to be His light in this world. We already know we were not made for this world, but for eternity.

We are responsible to one person: God. We are His children. And He loves us so much. He delights in us. But He’s known us from the beginning of time, long before we were born, long before time itself. He knew the lives we would have. He gave us a reason for being, passions, goals, and more. And He gave us purpose despite the mistakes we would make. Our lives are a constant learning curve.

When we put our focus on God and how He sees us, we should also find joy ourselves. Joy in the opportunity. Joy in the moment. Joy in the fact that He loves brock-wegner-e5hXTb9lupQ-unsplash us no matter what.

God knew I would have health issues, and they would force me to find ways to work around the normal 9-5 job. He knew being a homeschool mom would keep me hopping, making it feel like I had 2 full-time jobs. Struggling to find my place in the world would give me the grace to work with others struggling to find theirs.

Failure is something I’m quite familiar with—and not just when it comes to deadlines. With each mistake, I’ve learned that it’s an opportunity to trust God and step deeper into grace. I know God is with me at each turn. And even when things don’t go as planned (and how often does that happen?), He still loves me. He still delights in me. And my joy is found in Him.

How has God been revealing His joy to you?

About the Author:

Whether she’s wielding a fantasy writer’s pen, a freelance editor’s sword, or a social media wand, Ralene Burke always has her head in some dreamer’s world. And her goal is to help everyone SHINE BEYOND! She has worked for a variety of groups, including Realm Makers, The Christian PEN, Kentucky Christian Writers Conference, and as an editor for several freelance clients. Her first novel, Bellanok, is available on Amazon!

When her head’s not in the publishing world, she is wife to a veteran and homeschooling mama to their three kids. Her Pinterest board would have you believe she is a master chef, excellent seamstress, and all around crafty diva. If she only had the time . . .

You can also find her on Facebook, Twitter, or at her website.

Let’s talk about this! I never would’ve thought I have a fear of failure. I’ve often said, which I believe, that there’s really no failure when we walk with God. It’s all learning, growing in Him and His will for us, and allowing Him to transform our thinking and will.

But yesterday, something hit my insecurities (and revealed my people pleasing tendencies!), oddly enough, in the form of praise. A reviewer tagged me in a comment on Facebook that, in essence, let me know about THIS. It was a bit surreal to see my name listed among such great authors. That should’ve been cause for celebration, right?

Instead, I felt a tweak in my gut as I thought about the story I’m working on, one I’ve revised at least half a dozen times that I plan to release … in a few short months. (gulp.) And all I could think about was how terrible the story was, how inadequate I felt as a writer, and how I would let this reviewer and all my other readers down.

And then I had to laugh as I realized how easily I fell into the fear of rejection trap–whenever I turn my eyes off Christ and His will for me.

That, my friends, is the answer. But isn’t it always? For as Paul says in Galatians 1:10, “If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant” (NLT).