January 2011

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I was eight, maybe nine, and on my way to school when I noticed a woman taking her trash to the curb. She held the black bag in one hand and a walking stick in the other, scanning the ground with her “eyes” as she went. I ran to her side, ready to rescue this blind lady, little did I know that God had sent her that day to help me.

She smiled at me and nodded, then humbly allowed me to carry her trash to the curb. It wasn’t until a few days later when I was sitting at the breakfast bar in her kitchen that I realized the humbled love she showed to me that morning. As I watched her answer her phone, make popcorn in the micro (for me) and flitter around her kitchen with more ease than a sighted woman, I was slightly embarrassed by my offer to “help” her only days before. She let me help her not because she needed it, but because doing so would form a connection–a point of contact.

Before long, I was at her house nearly every day. I don’t remember exactly what we talked about. I do remember the popcorn, and the tremendous joy that filled her home. I remember watching her husband and son very closely, curious by their rather silly antics and the ease with which they interacted. But what I remember most was the overwhelming sense of being loved and accepted as day after day Mr. and Mrs. Neighborhood (my name for her and her husband) showed me love.

She died a few years later, not knowing how the story would end–not knowing the chain of events her allowing me to carry her garbage started, not knowing the impact those afternoons had on me. She didn’t understand fully until she got to heaven, and although I don’t believe God caused her blindness, (it was the result of a stroke), I know He used  it to bring her and I together. And through her, I got a taste of the love of Christ.

I wonder if she were standing on the edge of eternity, able to see into the abyss, and asked to choose between her sight or my salvation, I wonder what she would have chosen. Actually, I know what she would have chosen. She showed me daily.

But even now, Mrs. Neighborhood’s story doesn’t end. Every time I write, every time I pray, every time I cuddle up with my daughter, a Bible spread between us, we are seeing the fruits of her service (and other amazing women God placed in my path as I was growing up.)

And it all started because she let a little girl help her.

I thought of her this morning during church as I read 1 Thessalonians 2:1-7

1 You know, brothers and sisters, that our visit to you was not without results. 2 We had previously suffered and been treated outrageously in Philippi, as you know, but with the help of our God we dared to tell you his gospel in the face of strong opposition. 3 For the appeal we make does not spring from error or impure motives, nor are we trying to trick you. 4 On the contrary, we speak as those approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel. We are not trying to please people but God, who tests our hearts. 5 You know we never used flattery, nor did we put on a mask to cover up greed—God is our witness. 6 We were not looking for praise from people, not from you or anyone else, even though as apostles of Christ we could have asserted our authority. 7 Instead, we were like young children among you.

Her visits with me were not without results. The results just wouldn’t be seen until many years later, long after she’d passed. And she wasn’t concerned with the praise of men. To the contrary, she humbled herself and allowed a young child to help her.

Her life was the very first domino in a beautifully intertwined display, except the story really began long before then, with another domino set in motion in her life, and the domino set in motion in the life that loved on her. Each life, each domino, was but a tiny, yet powerful, part of a glorious, life-saving story that will one-day unfold before us. When we stand in God’s presence, surrounded by an innumerable family of believers, each one but another domino that set into motion another chain, everything will all make sense and all we’ll be able to say is, “Amen! Praise and glory and wisdom and thanks and honor and power and strength be to our God for ever and ever. Amen!” (Revelations 7:12 NIV)

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The Bible tells us life is but a wafer, our time on earth is short, and this world is not our home, and yet, we rarely speak of heaven. Most Christians don’t even have a clue what heaven is like. Perhaps our biggest deception, our biggest distraction, is the here and now. It’s like we’re all stuck in an airport terminal dining on stale ham and cheese sandwiches, fighting for access to the vending machine and the seat closest to the window, not realizing the Bahamas are only a short flight away. Yet Jesus endured the cross “for the joy that was set before Him.” And He told us to do the same.

According to John C. Hutchison, part of our inability to grasp eternity is due to our need for instant gratification. With instant messaging, texting, and high speed internet, we’re trained to think of the here and now. Tomorrow is a long way away. Eternity even longer…so long we consider it almost insignificant. Yet, the Bible tells us this world stinks. It’s plagued by sin, disease and death. (Genesis 3, Romans 8:22-28) One of the most oft quoted Scripture passages is Romans 8:28, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” We use this verse to comfort ourselves when we lose a job, determining that God must have a better job waiting for us. We use it in the context of today–the here and now–but when we read the entire passage, I don’t think that’s what this verse is talking about. According to Romans 8, our world is under a curse. It groans, like a woman in childbirth. The hope is not in this life, but in the life to come.

Romans 8:20-28 “For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God.

We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. 27 And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

Here’s the problem with misquoting or misunderstanding the Romans 8:28 verse. If we’re looking for our rewards in the here and now, we won’t know how to handle it when difficulties come. We’ll be blind sighted. And even worse, we’ll lose hope, because what we hoped for may not come to pass. But our hope is not in this sin-plagued world. Our hope lies in eternity where God will wipe away ever tear from our eyes, where disease will be non-existent and our joy will be inexpressible. And God will reward His children for every trial endured here on earth.

Matthew 5:11-12 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of Me. Rejoice and be glad because great is your reward in heaven.”

Speaking of earthly trials, John C. Hutchinson says, “These dark moments actually have eternal significance!…Our lives are part of a bigger story, a drama that is unfolding in the heavenlies. When we understand this, it allows us to see every situation in life, especially the difficult ones, as faith opportunities that carry eternal significance.”

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I think I’m on an “offend as many people as I can” streak lately. Yesterday On Reflections, I talked about submision in marriage, and today, I’m talking about our tendency to rob God’s glory. Neither of which are very popular topics. And as if that wasn’t bad enough, I’m about to break rule number one in blogging–never go over 1,000 words. So…I’m warning you now. Feel free to check out at any time.

Most of my friends are writers, so I hear a lot about being goal oriented and “pursuing your dream!” But often, it appears the dream overshadows the Dream-giver. It’s easy to get so caught up in the things of God that we forget God all together. Only problem, without God, they’re just things.

Let me illustrate. When you think of Abraham, what comes to mind first? We often hear about how God blessed him and made his offspring into a mighty nation, right? Or what about Joseph? God gave Joseph a dream of grandeur, a dream that was ultimately fulfilled some thirteen (or so) years later. When we retell the story, what do we focus on? The dream, right? How God gave it to Joseph and everyone else wanted to slam on it, but God exalted Joseph anyway.

Only it wasn’t about Joseph, and it wasn’t about Abraham. God raised up Abraham for a purpose–not to bless Abraham, but instead, to bless all the nations through him. Abraham was the father of the Jewish race, and the Jews were the nation God used to reveal Himself to all mankind (and to bring about salvation through Jesus Christ.) When God blessed Abraham, in reality He was blessing us.

Same with Joseph. When we first meet Joseph in Genesis 37, it appears he’s consumed with the dream and how he’s going to rule over his brothers.

Genesis 37:5-11

 5 Joseph had a dream, and when he told it to his brothers, they hated him all the more. 6 He said to them, “Listen to this dream I had: 7 We were binding sheaves of grain out in the field when suddenly my sheaf rose and stood upright, while your sheaves gathered around mine and bowed down to it.”

 8 His brothers said to him, “Do you intend to reign over us? Will you actually rule us?” And they hated him all the more because of his dream and what he had said.

 9 Then he had another dream, and he told it to his brothers. “Listen,” he said, “I had another dream, and this time the sun and moon and eleven stars were bowing down to me.”

 10 When he told his father as well as his brothers, his father rebuked him and said, “What is this dream you had? Will your mother and I and your brothers actually come and bow down to the ground before you?” 11 His brothers were jealous of him, but his father kept the matter in mind.

After a few hard knocks and some rather painful humbling, he comes to realize it was never about him. It was about how God wanted to save many, including his brothers.

Notice the difference in tone, and who Joseph points to, in this passage:

Genesis 45:5-7

5 And now, do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you. 6 For two years now there has been famine in the land, and for the next five years there will be no plowing and reaping. 7 But God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance.

So, although God used one man, named Joseph, to bring about His plan, all the while He was thinking about the masses. Because that’s how God works. (I can’t help but wonder how his brothers felt, once they’d reached the end of the story and realized that God had their well-being in mind the entire time. Ah, if only we could see the bigger picture!)

So how does this related to writing? (Or any other “dream” God has given you.) God doesn’t give us gifts for our own benefit. Nor are they ever intended to bring glory to ourselves. He gives us gifts so that His purpose can be fulfilled. He blesses us so that we will be a blessing. But when our eyes are on ourselves, we get in the way.

The first step, it seems, is to let it go. Hand your gift, whatever it is, over to God, to be used as He sees fit. Whether that means writing a best-selling novel or spending hours crafting a Vacation Bible School lesson for your small, unknown church. It’s His gift, remember? You’re just the vessel.

As I continually work towards intentionally living, I’m going to ask God, daily, to empty me of self, fill me with Him and help me to catch a glimpse of the bigger, eternal picture. I’m going to actively and personally pray Romans 12:1-2

“Dear Lord, do not allow me to conform to the things of this world, but transform me by renewing my mind. Help me to see and understand Your good, pleasing will. Help me to offer my body, my time, my gifts and my mind, to You as a perfect, pleasing sacrifice. This will be my act of worship.”

The world says forge ahead. God says wait on Me and allow Me to live through you, as I want, when I want, because I see the bigger picture, and I’ve written the ending.

Yesterday a fb friend sent me a message with this video in it and I thought I’d share it. After you watch it, spend a moment in prayer, asking God to show you areas or times when you’ve been tempted to seek your own glory instead of acting in humbled obedience. Then, ask Him to help you lay yourself, your gifts, your dreams, your time…whatever, on the alter so that you can be a cleansed and open vessel ready to do His will. Ask Him to enable you to catch a glimpse of His bigger, eternal picture. And remember, when our time on earth is done and we stand before the throne of God, we will be held accountable for not what we accomplished, but how well be obeyed.

(And be patient. Eventually I’ll quit talking about Joseph…I think.)

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On Monday, I talked about living in victory. On Tuesday, I spent the day swimming in uncertainty. Perhaps God wanted to cushion today’s post with compassion. Emotions and our thought processes are very closely tied and although we are commanded to take our thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ, it’s not always easy.

I’ve struggled with wayward thoughts my entire life. Discouragement, fear, frustration…numerous other emotions, all begin in my head. And once I let that first thought take hold, I feed it, and work it, strengthening it with one negative thought after another until it balloons. I think this is a constant battle. Truth tells us God is in control. Truth tells us God’s ways are always best even when we don’t understand. Truth tells us this life on earth is fleeting and our true home lies in heaven. Truth tells us we belong to Christ and have been purchased at a high price.

Quite honestly, I am struggling today. A friend is sick, and it has reminded me how incredibly fleeting life is. The Bible tells us tomorrow is promised to no one, yet how rarely does that truth sink in. And yet, when the reality of mortality hits, so many things become inconsequential.

Today I am focusing on Philipians 4:6-8 as I diligently put into practice 2 Corinthians 10:5 which tells me to demolish every argument that sets itself up against the knowledge of God and to take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 

Philipians 4:6-8

6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

 8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

 I will pray with thanksgiving, reminding myself of all the times and ways God has shown up in the past. I will focus on who He is–Creator, Redemer, Sustainer, Comforter, Prince of Peace, Almighty Father. When I remember what He has done in the past and meditate on His incomprehensible love and power, anxious thoughts diminish. My concerns are placed in a “bigger picture” perspective. Then, I will lay my concerns in His hands, knowing that He is sovereign,  loving and all-knowing.

The final verse is one I like to repeat outloud when I pray, (4:8) especially when my thoughts attempt to run amuck.

“Lord, You are lovely. You are pure. You are honorable and worthy of respect.”

In Tony Evans, Free at Last, he gives an illustration of a driver stuck in traffic attempting to find his way out by craning his neck to see around the long line of cars. As I read, I was reminded of the years we spent in Souther California. If you’ve ever lived in the Los Angeles area, you know how frustrating rush hour traffic can be. You’ll do anything to avoid it, even if that means hanging out down town until eight or nine, when the bumper to bumper crawl finally ends.

Amidst the chaos, how many of us would turn to a fellow driver, moving beside us at a five mile an hour crawl, to ask for guidance? Their vision is equally blocked. All they can see is the mass of cars all around them. And it wouldn’t do any good to look behind us, either. Instead, we turn on the radio in search of the helicopter update–news from one who is above it all and can clearly see.

God is our helicopter view. Most of the time our view will be distorted by the massive traffic jam all around us. And this is why we walk by faith, not by sight, trusting in the unwavering, unfailing love of God.

And before I leave, I ask that you pray for my friend and her family, for peace, an overwhelming sense of God’s love, strength and healing. I spoke with her on Monday night and rejoiced in the extreme peace God had given her. God is holding her tightly and pouring His love through her. His love is never-ending, never-failing.

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Last night a large group of men and women from Set Free Ministries came to our church to share their testimonies. The pews were packed, and the celebration was high. These people cherished their new life in Christ. They understood what it means to be set free.

One man took the mic and talked about how God had taken him from the streets, out of his mind and hooked on drugs, to victorious living. Addiction had robbed him of his family, but God set him free and gave him a wife. Another man followed, and gave a similar story. He was enslaved to addiction, and was losing his mind, but God set him free. Then a woman stood up. She looked to be seven or eight months pregnant, and as she talked about spending time in prison with no concern for herself or anyone else, then transitioned to the joy of sobriety and bringing a baby girl to term, I marveled at the peace evident in her features–how could such a soft woman have been so hard?

Testimony after testimony said the same thing: I was enslaved but God set me free. Many had lost their families, but God had provided a new family among their fellowship of believers. And yet, many of them had reconciled with their families. Moms, who’d lost their children to the state because of addiction, regained their children. Those who once slept on the streets now found employment and were now reaching out to others still buried in the mire.

We hear stories like these quite often, although, perhaps not often enough, because for every freed Christian, there appears to be many still clinging to their old life of sin. I say still clinging because it’s never an issue of ability. According to the Bible, if you’ve given your life to Jesus, you have been made new. Sin no longer holds you. You’ve been set free. Perhaps we just aren’t aware of our freedom.

According to Tony Evans, author of Free At Last, our struggles come because we’ve forgotten, or failed to fully grasp, our identity in Christ. True, there’s still a healthy dose of Adam in us, threatening to rear its ugly head when we’re spiritually unprepared, but our God is bigger, remember? Our God is stronger. Sin is broken. He has saved us.

I am reminded of a passage in Luke 17:1-10:

 1 Jesus said to his disciples: “Things that cause people to stumble are bound to come, but woe to anyone through whom they come. 2 It would be better for them to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around their neck than to cause one of these little ones to stumble. 3 So watch yourselves.

   “If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. 4 Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying ‘I repent,’ you must forgive them.”

 5 The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith!”

 6 He replied, “If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it will obey you.

   7 “Suppose one of you has a servant plowing or looking after the sheep. Will he say to the servant when he comes in from the field, ‘Come along now and sit down to eat’? 8 Won’t he rather say, ‘Prepare my supper, get yourself ready and wait on me while I eat and drink; after that you may eat and drink’? 9 Will he thank the servant because he did what he was told to do? 10 So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.’”

We like the verse that talks about faith, right? And we’ll use it when praying for something we desire, but notice the entire passage. Jesus isn’t talking about uprooting mulburry trees. He’s talking about forgiving someone when they’ve wronged us.

By saying, “Increase our faith!” the apostle was saying, “I can’t do this!” But Jesus said, “Oh, yes you can. You have all the faith you need.”

Notice the rest of the passage. Oh, how we like to pat ourselves on the back when we offer forgiveness to someone, especially if they’ve hurt us deeply. Or if someone gets in our face and we take the high road. As if our obedience somehow makes us super Christians. That kind of thinking only keeps us rooted in sin, making it appear as if we’ve somehow done something great by obeying God.

As I said when we first began our series on intentional living, the first thing that needs to go is, “I can’t help it,” type thinking.

Either God is sovereign or He’s not. Either we’re new creations or were not. Either we’ve been given the mind of Christ or we haven’t. It’s not like we get a small dose of the Holy Spirit when we accept Christ as our Lord and Savior. Those brothers and sisters in Christ who shared their testimonies at my church last night didn’t get an extra serving of God.

Christ lives within us and has given us everything we need to live victorious, peace-filled lives. It appears then, when we aren’t living in victory, the problem lies within us. And I would wager, it has a lot to do with our thought processes. This week I want to focus on taking our thoughts captive and making them obedient to Christ.

In the meantime, the next time you are tempted to say, “But I can’t help it!” meditate on this verse:

Galatians 2:20: “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.”

Jesus Christ, Creator of the universe, lives inside you. He’s given you everything you need to live a victorious life, an abundant life.

(And spend some time reading through Romans 6)

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A few weeks ago, a dear friend posted a heartwarming story on her facebook wall, so I shot her a quick fb message and asked if I could share it with you all. This week, I’ve been focusing on ways to reach out with the love of Christ, whether through prayer, a kind word, or even just taking the time to offer a smile. Last year I took an evangelism class and it really opened my eyes. I learned that the journey to faith is rarely a one time step. Often when people come to Christ, God has already been working in their lives for quite some time. Through a neighbor ten years back who baked pizzas when they returned from the hospital with a newborn. Through a mailman who offered to pray. Through a family member who consistently demonstrated patience, or even a passerby who offered a quick, “God bless you.” Often we’ll have no idea the impact our smiles, prayers, and words have…until we get to heaven.

There are three things I love about Melissa’s story:

1. God had been loving on her, drawing her closer to Himself, and preparing her heart to receive His love, for years.

2. Melissa caught a glimmer of God through the consistent witness of her cousin’s life.

3. Her teacher shared when God laid it on her heart to do so, and the timing was perfect.

One question: What if the teacher had been too busy to go to the coffee shop that day? Or too concerned about offending Melissa to hand her the gospel tract?

The next time you feel God calling you to reach out, stop and think, what if the person He’s calling you to reach out to is praying to Him right at that moment, asking Him if He’s really there, if He really cares, and if He can hear them. You might be their answer to prayer.

And my final thoughts are…when I first approached Melissa, I asked if she could share what God had been doing in her life. Her first reaction was, “Wow, I don’t know. Has He done something I’m not aware of?” But once she’d taken the time to look back, she realized God had been there all along.

Melissa’s story:

On first thought when reading this, I was thinking “Yikes, has He been moving in my life without me recognizing it?” Then I drove home for lunch in a quiet car and thought it over and it came to me clear as day. He has been moving, maybe taking small baby steps with this once skeptic, but nonetheless I am learning that none of us are on the same trek with Him now are we?

About a year ago, my relationship with my cousin Robin was rekindled. We hadn’t been in contact for nearly 30 years. My dear cousin is a true woman of God. Her spirit is always praising Him and in her faith I found something I knew was missing within myself. The more we talked, the more my path was being cleared. In May or June, I purchased my first Bible and began reading. Prayer came naturally although the prayers I send up may be a bit chaotic and jumbled, I am sure He understands and can sort it all out.

To backtrack my journey I should mention, that when I say I had been skeptical it was mostly based on what I now see as a misunderstanding in what it means to be Christian. Having never been surrounded by religion growing up, my vision was narrow, although I thought it wasn’t at the time. From my perspective, I saw “bad” things happening to “good” people. I had a person who I thought I would spend my life with taken away in death. The people I knew who were church go-ers, in my opinion were hypocrits and Sunday warriors who dropped their religion at the church door as they walked out after services. By saying these things, I don’t intend to offend anyone, but to understand my journey I must be honest.

It is with fresh eyes and an open heart that God is working through me the most right now. I am less quick to jump to judgement about another person, because I now understand more. Yes, we are all on different journeys to take us where we are meant to eventually be. I am learning that bad things will happen to good people, but it is part of a larger plan, one that I cannot see but must trust and have faith in. When you read the stories of the Bible, it is filled with those exact types of scenarios. Last year, those kind of thoughts would have never occurred to me and I would instead see only the despair and feel bitter about what I perceived as “bad”.

Once the walls that I had built which were keeping the religious at bay started crumbling, I began to notice more people being drawn to me (or perhaps me to them). In search of a church home, I began attending services at a few different churches trying to find one that fit me best. Now I am still on that search but it is one of the things I want to really focus on this year. Knowing that the more I submit myself to receiving, the more I will be able to give.

The day I bumped into my teacher, Miss Winter (Sue), felt like a culmination of God saying to me “See, I am here.” To have this woman, who was important to me so long ago, be the deliverer of a small Christmas tract about Jesus, and for me to be willing accept it – read it and for her name to be there was more than a coincidence. It felt like a true gift and I accept it.

*   *   *

Jesus offers that same gift to each of us, but for it to be of value, we must accept it. What about you? Has God been working in your life? He always is at work, loving us, drawing us, guiding us. Sometimes we just need to take a moment to step back, and look back, to see His hand. When you do, you’ll find He’s been there all along.

 

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A couple months ago, I noticed our daughter had shifted friends, so I asked her about it. A girl she used to speak of frequently was now rarely mentioned. She explained that although she was still friends with the other girl, she struggled connecting on a deeper level for spiritual reasons. Concerned, I pressed her further. Apparently, this girl claimed Christ but didn’t live it out, and many of her behaviors made our daughter uncomfortable.

She shared a few things with me, then I explained how we’re all at different stages in our faith, but her final comment got me thinking: “I’m not even sure if she’s a Christian. She never shares her faith.”

The wisdom of a teenager–but the more I thought about it, the more sense her statement made. Can we truly love and be close to Christ and not feel burdened for those who don’t know Him?

Here’s how I figure it: the closer we grow to Christ, the more His desires become our own–the more He aligns our heart with His and pours His love through us. Yes, He cares about the little details in our  lives and wants us to help one another, but what He’s most passionate about is seeing people made right with Him. The salvation of others isn’t a casual concern for Him. It was on the forefront of His mind when He knelt in the Garden of Gethsemane in anguish. It was on the forefront of His mind when He faced His accusers, and like a lamb before His shearers, silently endured. It was on the forefront of His mind as He walked that long, humiliating, treacherous road to His death. It was on the forefront of His mind as He hung on the cross and looked down upon His tormenters and said, “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.”

This week, I’ll be sharing stories of people who said yes to God and allowed Him to love others through them. As you read these accounts, ask yourself, “What if they’d said no? What if they’d been too shy, too busy, or perhaps just too distracted?”

Every day, God opens innumerable doors all around us. Each day, His prodigal sons and daughters are crying out to Him, asking some hard questions like, “Do you really love me? Are you really there? Can you hear me?” And each day, God wants to use you to provide the answer the human heart so desperately needs.

Today Connie Stevens, author of Leave Me Never (love that title!) shares a very touching story of how God used her in the check-out line to shine a tiny glimmer of hope on another woman’s day.

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One week before Christmas, I received a case of author copies of my debut novel, Leave Me Never, from Heartsong Presents. Giddy with excitement, I gave a few copies to friends and family. I remember, when attending a writer’s conference, someone said to always carry a few of your books with you because you never know when God will give you an opportunity to network with someone who can help you promote your book, or use the book to introduce someone to Christian fiction. So I stuck a book in my purse as I was heading out to run errands.

The week before Christmas every place was crowded, the lines were long, and patience seemed in short supply. My last stop was the grocery store. The girl who checked me out looked and sounded tired and discouraged, so I smiled at her. She tried to smile back but her effort appeared forced. I asked her if she was ready for Christmas. When all she did was lift her shoulders, something hit my heart and I knew this girl was going through a difficult time.

As she finished checking out my groceries, I asked her (a bit apprehensively) if she liked to read. She kind of half-shrugged and said, “When I have time.”

I sent a prayer heavenward and pulled the book out, handed it to her and said, “Merry Christmas. This is my debut novel.”

Again, the forced smile and a mumbled thank you. The bag boy tucked the last bag into my cart and turned it toward the door, waiting for me to join him. I saw the cashier out of the corner of my eye turn the book over and glance at the back. As the bag boy and I reached the door, the girl called out behind me. I turned. She had tears in her eyes as she held up the book. She tapped her finger on the back cover. “Is this what this book is about?”

I smiled (much bigger this time and not the least bit apprehensive) and said, “Yes.”

You know how sometimes you “lock eyes” with someone and unspoken communication zings back and forth? I saw hope in her eyes and this time her smile wasn’t forced when she said, “Thank you. Merry Christmas.”

The first line on the back cover of my book reads, “Does God keep His promises?”

I needed a tissue before I could drive home.

The image of this girl and the tears in her eyes has lingered in my memory. Since my book didn’t officially release until three weeks later, this cashier was among my first readers. My heart was arrested by that term—readers. As Christian authors, the reason we write goes beyond entertainment. Our writing is a ministry. We never know who will be impacted by a character or a plot that draws that reader in and points their heart in the direction of Jesus. Praying for my readers has become a new passion.

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Connie Stevens lives in north Georgia with her husband of thirty-seven years, John. One cantankerous kitty—misnamed Sweet Pea—allows them to live in her home. Some of Connie’s favorite pastimes include reading, browsing antique shops, collecting teddy bears, and gardening. She also enjoys making quilts to send to the Cancer Treatment Centers of America. Leave Me Never is Connie’s first published book, and is the first book of her Home To Willow Creek series. The second book of the series, Revealing Fire, releases in March, and the third book, Scars of Mercy, releases in July. Visit Connie’s website to find out more!

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And I leave you with this verse: Colossians 4:5-6 “Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.”

Be wise, be alert and full of grace. May everyone you come into contact with today be blessed because they crossed your path. And notice how closely this passage mirrors Ephesians 4:15 and 1 Peter 3:15. Truth and love go hand in hand. One without the other is devastating!

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This morning as I drove to meet my mentor, KLOVE radio shared a story of a homeless man who had been given a second chance. I imagine you’ve heard this story by now as it’s circulated the web and airwaves quite a bit, but one thing that hit me was that it was his ex-wife who prayed for him first. That reminded me how powerful marriage is. The Bible tells us spouses become one when they wed–like two slips of paper glued together. Or perhaps more accurately, like threads of yarn tightly woven. You can rip the couple apart, or unwind the threads, but neither paper nor thread will ever be the same again. The torn paper will be shredded and the strands of yarn frayed and stretched. In most cases, (I don’t have the wisdom or knowledge to address marital unfaithfulness, abuse or addiction) it is far easier to do what it takes to make a marriage work then deal with the stress, pain and long-term consequences of divorce.

Often, it is easier to build on the good until the good overshadows the bad, then it is to chase fires, if that makes sense. This month on reflections, we’re going to build on the good, the lovely, and the praiseworthy. We’re going to shower our spouses with affection, focus on their positive traits and ways to build, encourage and affirm them. I invite you to join us.

Stop for a moment and think back to your first date with your spouse. Relive the moment when he/she first said, “I love you,” and visualize the love in his/her eyes when marriage was first discussed.

Often you can spot newly weds in a crowd. They’re the ones that steal glances at one another, bright smiles on their faces. They hold hands and giggle…alot.

But if we’re not careful, time, the stress of life and the pitter-patter of feet running in a million different directions saps the giggly, lovey-dovey, googly-eyed  romance out of our marriage–if we let it.

Today on Reflections we’re taking steps to rekindle that flickering flame.

And, join me on Rose McCauley’s blog as I talk about Clash of the Titles and why I’m so passionate about Christian fiction.

Then, come back Monday to hear how God used one of my friends to touch a hurting woman with His love.

In the meantime, be loved, be blessed, and as you listen to this, never forget, God is the God of second chances and every day is a chance for each of us to begin again. And for those of you who’ve prayed for loved ones so long, you’re discouraged and tired, don’t give up! God’s working, even now, even when you can’t see His hand.

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It’s hard for me to think in terms of eternity. I understand we’re all going to one of two places, depending on where we put our trust, but when I pray for the salvation of others, it’s actually the here and now I’m most concerned with. I know the peace, freedom and joy that comes from walking with God. I also know the pain that comes from being separated from Him. The other night, my husband said, “You are the most balanced person I know.” I’ve never received a higher compliment, especially considering where God has carried me from. This got me thinking about my faith walk in particular and I realized that God is all about balance. Apart from God, our lives easily become dominated, by work, food, television…it doesn’t really matter. An unfulfilled heart cries out for wholeness, and seeks temporary fillers.

I’ve heard people with depression or bipolar disorder often self-medicate using drugs or alcohol. People without Christ (or not centered fully on Christ) self-medicate with temporary fillers. Only these fillers leave us empty and grasping for more. It is at this point the behaviors become “addictive”. The only solution, then, is to continually draw near to God, through prayer and study. The closer we are to Him, the more  balanced our lives will be because He removes those “distracting fillers” and replaces them with His divine, all-consuming love.

Sometimes His love will break us, but only in order to heal. Other times it will convict us, but only to draw us to His better. Whether healing, strengthening, guiding or chastising, it begins and ends with God as we draw near to Him in increasing intimacy and allow Him to do whatever needs to be done in our hearts and lives.

It can be easy to go through the motions. I’ve had numerous mornings where I’ve read through a Bible passage without paying attention to a single word. So I’ll read it again, and again, my mind drifting each time. And I’ve been known to sift through a rather long to-do list in the middle of prayer. But when I go through the motions disengaged, I’ve lost sight of the bigger picture. And I’ve robbed myself of soul-fulfilling time with Christ. Christ didn’t die so I could fill my day with habits and agendas. He died so I could have intimate fellowship with Him. Yes, He wants me to read my Bible and pray, but that’s just the first step in our walk. More than anything, He wants me to know Him, and to draw near to Him with an unveiled, authentic heart.He wants to walk through life with me, like a tender Father reaching his hand to a trusting child.

If I’m going through the motions without connecting to God on a heart-to-heart level, I’ve lost sight of what Christianity is all about.

Is there an area of your life that’s out of balance? A behavior that dominates your life? Perhaps you’re self-medicating, attempting to fill a need only God can fill. Spend a few moments in prayer, asking God to remove that stronghold (whether food, tv, internet, obsessively cleaning your house…whatever) and to strengthen your desire for Him. Then make a commitment to draw near to Him each day, and see if He doesn’t bring you to a place of increasing balance.