Whenever I hear another parent share about their children’s struggles, I’m reminded how important it is to train compassion in our children. I don’t believe compassion comes naturally. Oh, we may feel empathy on occasion, but it seems our first nature is to judge, hurt, point fingers, and exclude. As parents, we must be diligent about encouraging our children to look beyond the surface to the heart and to assume the best, not the worst, in others.

Today Julie Arduini, the Surrendered Scribe, shares a story about her precious little girl and a time in her life when she really could have used a friend.

How would you handle it? by Julie Arduini

Our daughter is in general good health now but as a baby had chronic multiple issues. Since she’s been 3 months old, weight is one of them. We’ve been to a dietician and work with an endocronologist. We have seven plus years of files, appointments, therapies and oh yes…the comments.

I worked a decade with a certain segment of population, senior citizens. I learned so much from them, good…and bad. Every single time someone has had something to say about our daughter’s appearance it has been a stranger and a senior citizen.

I had one physically grab me and tell me I was killing my child. It was one of the top ten worst moments of my life. This person not only had no idea our whole story, she scared my other child. I will never forget.

This time around a frail looking woman in a walker stops me as I make sure my daughter and I give her plenty of space. She smiles and says “Oh your little girl reminds me of me at that age. I ate everything in sight.”

What do you say to that?

Me, I smiled and said nothing. Because this has happened so many times by women over the age of 70 that one day I’m afraid I’m going to just go off. I’ve even had people at church meet up with me in public and say oh you know her, she’s the mom to the fat girl.

So….how would you handle it?

One thing I can say, I’m a huge advocate for invisible illness loved ones. Forgive me for the times I sized up a situation with zero information.

Julie Arduini is a writer and speaker residing in NE Ohio with her husband and two children. Her work is included in such works as the Peculiar People Project’s Delivered and Guideposts Incredible Answers to Prayer series. She’s editing her contemporary romance, Spectacular Falls. She’s a webinar presenter through Christian Women Affiliate and is a team blogger with Christians Read. Her passion is to encourage audiences to find freedom through surrender, but knows it has to start with her. She’s surrendering the good, the bad, and—maybe one day—the chocolate. You can contact her through her website.

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