What can you do when someone you love has landed in such a dark place, it feels—to you and them—as if no amount of light can break through? This is how Teresa, President of Wholly Loved Ministries, described her experience with depression. In the latest Faith Over Fear podcast episode, she said she knew logically that God, her family, and her friends loved her, but she “wasn’t in a right state of mind.” Wonky chemical processing in her brain had hijacked her emotions and perception of reality. During that painful and discouraging time, she needed, and received, a lifeline through the steady presence of a gentle and empathetic friend.*
Someone who didn’t quote Bible verses at her, shame her with a series of “you shoulds” or get frustrated when Teresa’s battle appeared to make no sense to either of them.
In this, her friend mirrored the heart of her compassionate Father who draws close when we need Him most. Psalm 34:18, written by a man accustomed to overwhelming sorrow and fear, states, “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted
and saves the crushed in spirit” (ESV).
The Lord, Yahweh in the original Hebrew. The self-revealing, ever-present, relational God who steps into our messy and often turbulent lives, bringing supernatural strength to our weaknesses. Through His faithful and continual presence in our lives and pain.
The Lord is near. He responds to our pain, confusion, and even our rebellion and sin, by coming close. In love. This is an irrefutable truth that isn’t dependent upon our feelings or perceptions. This means, He remains with us, even when we don’t “feel” Him.
The Lord is near the brokenhearted. Those whose spirits are crushed.
Have you ever experienced grief so intense, your chest literally hurt and it felt as if someone was squeezing your heart in a vice? I have, and in those moments, I didn’t want anyone to list reasons as to why I should or could feel better. Nor did I want to hear a sermon on the goodness of God. In other situations, yes. But when guttural sobs wracked my body, all I wanted was to be held.
To know that I wasn’t alone.
And to receive the space I needed to cry.
I want to better mirror the gentle love and grace of my Savior. The One revealed in Isaiah 42:3, which states, “A bruised reed He will not break and a dimly burning wick He will not extinguish…” (NASB).
To rephrase, our Lord doesn’t belittle or berate the downtrodden. He doesn’t douse a person’s wound-weakened inner spark.
Instead, like a gardener nurturing a wilting and battered orchid, He kneels beside His hurting children, takes them in His arms, and nurses them, steadily yet slowly, to full bloom.
That is the Savior I represent—and was created to reflect. He doesn’t ask me to change or fix anyone. While He might, on occasion, encourage me to speak truth, most often, He simply invites me to walk beside my hurting friend as an instrument of His love, knowing He alone has the power to save the crushed in spirit. Knowing as well, whenever I step outside of His leading, regardless of how well-intended, I’m apt to start trampling upon those the Lord is working to lift up.
Those He is, at this moment, making ‘new.’ (Isaiah 43:19)
*Please note: Whenever we seek to offer others support, it’s important that we listen for and follow God’s lead to ensure that we ourselves are strong enough and in a safe place.
Why God Might Feel Distant and How to Connect With Him More Deeply – Faith Over Fear
- Why God Might Feel Distant and How to Connect With Him More Deeply
- How God Redeems Our Deepest Regrets (ft. Dustin Lolli, lead singer Sanctus Real)
- How God Helps Us Repair Broken Relationships
- How to Stop Letting Fear Drive Your Need for Control (ft. Lysa TerKeurst)
- How to Trust God When You Need a Miracle