I think we’ve all had times where all we can pray is, “Lord, why?” Why me? Why now? Why this? Unfortunately, I don’t believe God always gives us answers this side of heaven, but every once in a while, we catch a glimpse of God’s glorious, loving plan. And when that happens, all we can say is, “Amen!” Today my sweet friend Jodie Bailey, author of Freefall, shares such a moment and the heartfelt praise that ensued. As you read her account, pause to praise God afresh, knowing He truly does work all things to good, that He never wastes a tear or heartache, and that His plans are always, always loving and good.
Because I’d Been There by Jodie Bailey
I don’t know about you, but it seems like, at least around here, Satan is mad about something. He’s kicking and screaming right now, and it seems like there are a lot of people taking hits. I’ve seen division, hurt feelings, illness, crazy left-field things happening to families, churches, schools… Maybe his time is getting short and he knows it. I don’t know. I just know it seems to be amping up. Anybody else seeing it?
And I just realized that’s a tie-in to what happens to Joseph in Genesis 40. Honestly, I didn’t see it until just now. But Joseph knew a thing or two about situations getting worse, about hope appearing and disappearing. Favored son to slave. Favored slave to prisoner. Favored prisoner to, perhaps worst of all, forgotten. It’s one thing to have little hope. It’s another to have hope brush your fingertips then evaporate. In Proverbs 13, it says, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick…” I wonder how sick Joseph’s heart was after this?
Genesis 40:23 (GW)–Nevertheless, the chief cupbearer didn’t remember Joseph. He forgot all about him.
Some time after Joseph is falsely accused and imprisoned, Pharaoh’s cupbearer and chief baker land in prison and start dreaming dreams that Joseph–by God–correctly interprets. In gratitude and, wholeheartedly, the cupbearer promises to remember Joseph before the king… then immediately forgets.
How long do you imagine Joseph sat in prison waiting to get his say? How much hope do you think he had when the cupbearer headed into freedom? How long did he sit on the edge of his bed, jumping up at every sound, just knowing this was the moment, unable to sleep for the anticpation? How long before he sank into dejectedness and came the day he didn’t even bother to get out of bed? From Joseph’s view, it was hopeless.
I’ve been there. See, when I was mired down in fear for nearly ten years, I knew God could heal me. I knew he was 100% capable. Yet time after time after time, prayer after prayer after prayer, the healing didn’t come. I begged. I cried. I raged. I gave up. I hoped. I lost hope. I hoped again. Yet healing didn’t come. Until my birthday, eleven years ago tomorrow, when He freed me completely, healed me totally, in a moment. Over. Done. Free.
A few months ago, I sat with a student in the throes of a panic attack… and I knew what to say. I knew how to respond. And sitting there with her, it came over me. It was worth it. Nearly ten years of crying out prepared me to sit with a hurting child. And I finally, finally, finally saw why God waited. He had a reason. He had a purpose. And even if it was just to help one heart, it was worth it.
It was the same with Joseph. God waited. He had a purpose for allowing Joseph to suffer. No, I can’t explain it totally, but I know all Joseph went through prepped him to save thousands of lives later. I know God knew what He was doing, even when Joseph thought he’d been locked in a dark, black, hopeless box.
We can’t see the whole chess board. God can. As hard as it is–and believe me, it’s hard to say it even–but that’s when trust happens. That’s when we have to believe that we believe that we believe that God knows what’s coming, and none of this is wasted. In the end, it’s going to be glorious beyond anything we can possibly see coming.
Jodie Bailey is Tarheel born and bred. After fifteen years as a military spouse, she’s proud to be a retired military spouse settled back in North Carolina with her husband and daughter. She is the author of the military suspense novel Freefall and is a contributor to Edie Melson’s devotional for military families, Fighting Fear: Winning the War at Home. When not working on her next novel, she teaches middle schoolers to love writing as much as she does (if she’s lucky that day and they’re actually listening…). Jodie loves to bake, ride the Harley with her husband, and fish the Outer Banks with their daughter. You can find her on the web at www.jodiebailey.com.
Her debut novel, Freefall, has been called amazing, awesome, and explosive:
With one accusation, army officer Cassidy Matthews’s name, reputation—and life—are on the line. A Special Forces soldier insists that Cassy’s Fort Bragg-based unit is smuggling drugs. And the accuser? It’s Cassy’s handsome, stubborn ex-husband, Major Shane Logan. Shane knows Cassy is innocent, which is why he’s sure she’s being set up to take the fall. Proving it, though, means working together…and trying to ignore the feelings they still share. The closer they get—to the truth and each other—the more the danger grows from a ruthless criminal who’ll stop at nothing to destroy them both.
Have you ever encountered someone going through a trial you once endured, and if so, how did your previous experience help you minister to them? Do you believe genuine compassion deepens with understanding? How might pain and struggle help us further God’s kingdom?
Let’s talk about this!
Share your stories with us in the comments below, on Living by Grace, or join our online Bible study. We’d love to have you!
Jennifer, thanks for hosting Jodie.
Jodie–I think you and God must have teamed up to write this wonderful pick–me-up that I so needed today. Thanks for these reassuring words!
Thanks, Elaine! You can’t beat God’s timing.
I have got to get this book and read it! Once I catch up 🙂
Hope you enjoy it! 🙂 Thank you!
I needed these words today. Jodie, thanks for writing them. Jennifer, thanks for sharing them through your blog. Sometimes life is hard…having each other to turn to makes it all a little easier!
Thank you, Audrey. I love it when God’s calendar lines up perfectly. He keeps reminding me He knows it all already and has it all scheduled out. 🙂
Elaine, I’m so glad you received encouragement from Jodie’s post. Isn’t it beautiful how God can use some of our biggest hurts to minster to others?
Jen, I know you’ll enjoy it! Jodie is such a gifted writer with a heart centered in Christ.
Audrey, thanks for stopping by today and may God surround you in His ever-present love. 🙂
You’re too nice to me, Jen… 🙂
I loved this. I am so thankful for when people share similar stories with me to help me on my journey. I LOVE when I can help others as well. God does not waste our tears is RIGHT ON.
That’s awesome, Beth! Thank you…
Thank you. These words were important for me to hear today
Sent from my iPhone
Love you, Mom.
Thank you, Jen’s mom. 🙂
Jen, Thanks for having me! I love how “wait” answers from God work out in the end. He has been reminding me of that quite a bit lately. 🙂
Me too. I have been in the “wait” place for quite some time but I do not have anxiety nor frustration. Peace!!!
I think you nailed it, Jodie. Satan has been on the warpath. He knows his days are numbered. But greater is He that’s within us, than he that is in the world. And NO weapon that is formed against us shall prosper, in Jesus’ name.
Ahem. Sorry, got a little carried away there. 🙂
The tears, trials, and torment were absolutely not in vain. God will use all of it to His glory. And He’ll use you to help many.
God bless you, sister!